Sunday, December 11, 2011

{On Returning}

December 11, 2011
Saturday night Cara and I were up late packing, blogging and writing a couple notes to our favorite people. I am so thankful for the trainers, guides, front desk, spa peeps and other guests for making my 2 weeks so progressive. I feel like they all helped me save my life and I will never forget.

Sunday morning we weighed in. In my 2 weeks at the Resort, I lost 21.8 lbs and 9 inches. (May I remind you, this is not a normal weight loss. I lost a significant amount especially for a female) I must say I felt each and every pound disappear. These two weeks were the hardest 2 weeks of my life.

Friday...THE LAST HIKE! I felt extremely sore Friday morning and had to push my feet for every step. I was dreading the hike. It didn't even matter that it was the LAST effin' hike...I was exhausted. Kelly and I began the hike together. I walk behind her because I track her feet to help get me through. We were descending into a canyon at Malibu Creek and I took a turn and fell. We were about 90 minutes into the hike and I busted my tailbone. At first, I was hoping to just shake it off and go on, but it began to throb. Not sure if I fractured it or not, the hike back out was painful. Randy, one of the hiking guides and Kelly walked me back out, stopping several times. I got back to the van and laid face down on a picnic table icing my tailbone until the rest of our van got back. It was like the hiking gods said 'oh yea B, u don't like to's a kick in your ass. I didn't get to 'enjoy' my last hike and now I can barely sit. Thank you, Kelly for taking care of me.

Saturday we went to the location where the Biggest Loser show is filmed. It was amazing! I walked the grounds and saw the gym, pool and housing. It was exactly what I needed. For so long, I thought I'd never succeed on my own. That I needed to get on the show in order to really change my life. After spending 2 weeks at the Resort and then seeing the Ranch, I realized a healthy style is up to me and my choices, show or no show. Getting on the show is like winning the lottery. Would you bet your life on winning the California Lottery? Hell-to-the-F-no you would not. So do it. Now. Go.

This is my life to live. My choices to make. I returned home Sunday evening to a great dinner with the family. We gave them Biggest Loser shirts and shared our graduation videos. I went home and filled my house with Trader Joe's, a food scale, measuring cups, Tupperware and Monica surprised me with a Penguin from SodaStream! It carbonates regular water with the click of a button. If you know me, you know I pray to the carbonation gods. I'm mixing it with Crystal Light Pure. Yum yum kind-like-soda goodness.

Having been 'detoxed' over the last 2 weeks, I am choosing to refrain from Diet Coke and coffee. Two of the things I love most. I'm not saying it's forever, but its' definitely right for me now.

I woke up today and put my workout clothes on and drove to the water front by the Bay  Bridge. It was cold and very calming. I jogged the water front for 45 minutes and stretched for 30. It felt good...not great,  but good. I'm not trying to fool anyone here...working out sucks big time. I hate it. I hate how my legs feel, how much a sweat, how I can barely breathe, but I HATE being unhealthy way more. I'm keeping a food journal and will be meeting with personal trainers and looking into some classes soon. So far, my head is clear. I feel calm, mindful and happy to be home. The show eventually ends, you can't live at the Resort forever and you might not get to the Resort at all or ever again, but what you and I do have is that fire inside that never goes out. It's one choice at a time. The choice to eat well, move your body and love yourself. I'm just starting, but there's no going back.

The Resort fueled my fire. It pushed me to my limits and demanded more. I ate well, learned a lot, detoxed, and made a connection with a group of people that have my back unconditionally for the rest of my life. I feel so lucky that I had this opportunity.

Other than hiking, the only bad thing I have to say about the Resort, is saying good-bye to everyone.

Shout out's:

I have no words to fully express my sincere gratitude to everyone I have met these last 2 weeks. You have looked past my insecurities and helped me mend the broken person inside. I am forever grateful.


Trader Mutha Effin' Joe's has the best food and will be a huge part of my healthy eating success.

Get a Penguin SodaStream if you like soda and/or carbonation. It is the best gift ever...thank you, Nan.

You never know how much you sit until you break yo' rear on a hike. Stand up. You burn more calories.

Salsa, Wholly Guacamole and Crystal Light Pure...I love you.

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