I am so tired. I don't think I have ever been this physically fatigued before and every step is felt in my feet, legs and back. With that said, everyday I can tell my strength and endurance have increased.
I am not craving any of my comfort foods this week. Not sure if I mentioned it last week, but as I have detoxed, I have craved certain food that make me feel good, but those cravings have ceased and I feel clean inside.
I ran on the treadmill for 5 minutes during Mountain today. Five minutes is really not that long even for me, but that was after 9 other speed increases at 3 minutes each before I started running. At the time, I felt like my entire body was going to fail me, but now I feel motivated that all this hard work the last 10 days is really showing.
Since my last meeting with Essara, I am really trying to focus these last couple days left on preparation when I return home. We had a grocery shopping lecture today that really helped me. I have never been a good cook and don't really enjoy cooking that much so working on these areas is very important for me. I am not very creative and fall into making the same things over and over again until I just can't stand them anymore. I don't intend on becoming a chef, but I do need a few more meal choices to keep me going. The grocery lecture identified brand, types, and locations of some great options like Orowheat Whole Wheat Sandwich Thins, Lara bars, Wasa Crispy and Light Crackers, Pop Chips, Crystal Light Pure Fitness, Turkey Jerky and countless others. Many I had already heard of and tried, but I see it all in a completely different light now. Before I would pass many of these healthy choices up and now I view all the food options as variety in my food choices. Ak-mak crackers are my absolute fav, but now I will pair them with Laughing Cow Cheese or a low-fat string cheese. Cara and I talk frequently about how food has always been the focus of our lives and though, we still want to enjoy what we eat, we look at it more as fuel for our bodies. Meals don't always have to be the focus. Food doesn't need to hold the same importance it once did, but rather simple preparation, with fresh ingredients will satisfy us. I have always loved the convenience of a frozen meal. Just microwave and eat. There are many frozen meals with low calories and little to no fat, but the sodium usually exceeds our daily intake by the hundreds if not thousands. Daily, our sodium intake should be between 1500-2400 mg. One frozen meal can come pretty close. Most 'already prepared' food tends to be much higher in sodium. When I asked Jessica, the nutritionist, about frozen meals, she reminded me that it takes about the same time to prep fresh food as it does to microwave something. The most important part of the entire lesson is to always be prepared. I am one of those people that can't just eat one, so I made a list of food items that allow me to have a little more bang for my buck. Don't ask me to count out 15 crackers. My shopping trips are going to take awhile at first as I will be reading labels for serving sizes, calories, protein, fat, sodium and fiber. Shopping trips must be weekly for fresh food and meal prep, but I am ready.
I plan on sitting with each Biggest Loser Celeb that's here to pick their well fed brains on their favorite, quick, easy foods and meals before we leave. They have so much knowledge and I need to gain as much as possible from them.
I got to spend some time with Arthur Wornum (Season 11) today on the hike, between classes and in the pool. Arthur has lost a ton of weight and is here to continue his weight loss journey. That boy can move. Not only did he lead our hike, but he is always in the best mood. He always makes me laugh even during the hardest of moments. He is very real and very honest about the return home. It isn't easy. I am so honored to work hard beside him. He motivates me to keep pushing. I wish him the greatest life ever.
Sione Fa taught our Mountain class today. (May I just remind you, that I see these Biggest Losers as celebrities. If you have any insecurities, think of someone on TV that you are motivated by and hope to learn from...for me it's the Biggest Losers) So when I say Sione taught our Mountain class, I just can't really believe it. Anyway...during Mountain, Sione said something that I repeated about 3000 times..."It's not about the final result, it's about the journey". I believe anyone who struggles with weight, thinks about all the diets, quick fixes, options and changes they can make. Meg says overweight people are some of the smartest foodies on the planet. I have read and tried every diet from the Cabbage Soup to the Lemonade Diet. And I have thought countless times about gastric bypass surgery. I believe everyone lives their own lives and makes choices based on what is best for them. Success can be found. People do lose their weight and live healthy lives. The difference for me is the mental side. I don't believe gastric bypass would be the best option for me because "it is not about the final result, it's about journey". In order for me to lose my weight and keep it off, I need to feel every bead of sweat, every ache and pain, every hard day, every clothing size change, every process that takes me to my goal. The journey will be the key to my long lasting success. I have lost and gain many pounds, but I have never kept it off. I am worth all the time it takes to do this 'right' for me.
Sione...Thank you for your words during the Mountain class and for your sincere sense of humor and compassion. Love those calves.
Monica...just a few more days and I will be home to start our new life together and I can't wait.
Jessica...thank you for the invaluable lessons with food. Food is how I got myself to this sad point in my life and it is how I will never return to it.
Tara Costa...you are a badass and will always be my greatest inspiration.
Courtney Rainville...you had that marathon. You are such a beautiful, healthy woman and I will always be your fan.
Tips of the day:
No matter how many times I 'just try' fish, I don't like it. And that's ok. Find what you like.
Garbanzo beans, cucumbers, olives, tomatoes, carrots, and mushrooms make the best salads ever.