[RUN]

by Cara

This journey has taken me many places. Uphill and down. Fast and slow. Happy and sad. Nothing would have prepared me for where I am now. Since this journey began almost 2 years ago the questions, the advice, and the sharing began. Everyone wanted to know why and how and could they. 

Brianne and I have been drinking Shakeology for a year. We kick our own butts at home with the likes of Shaun T., Chalene Johnson and Tony Horton. And just 5 months ago I became a Team Beachbody Coach. With the tools of Beachbody and the results that I can see and the world can see, I get to share this with as many people as possible. I love it. I am half way through my first 30-day Challenge and I am amazed at the results and the participation of my challengers. 

There is more. As a Team Beachbody Coach I get to build my team of like minded hard working individuals who are also interested in not only changing their life but helping others change theirs. My long time friend, and the first Coach on my team, Taylor, came to me 2 weeks ago and asked if I thought she could run. See as ambulance dispatchers we used to dispatch large scale events, mostly marathons that ran across the city of San Francisco. For years we sat at the finish line, in the cold, wondering what it was that would make people run like that. 1 year ago Taylor was dispatching when I crossed the finish line of my second half marathon. Two weeks ago she came to me, as a Beachbody Coach, a friend, and a success story in progress. She has decided that instead of either of us being at the finish line she wants to cross it with me. July 27, 2014 we will run the San Francisco Marathon (well half 13.1 miles). Right now we train. I am training someone to run a marathon....ME! Its the best feeling in the world. 

Want to learn more about being your own boss, naming your hours and building a business on health and fitness. Check out my Beachbody page.

TRUST THE PROCESS

by Cara

Its been weeks. Maybe months. All I know is, too long. Phat Chances is our story. It is the hard proof of where we came from and where we are TRYING to go. It is ugly. It is sweaty. It is HARD. 

We are still plugging a long. For a second there, right around my birthday I became complacent and as any YO-YO dieter would know, that is when you FAIL. Becoming complacent in your lifestyle means you are doing things you don't even think will sabotage your efforts. I was eating french fries and well a LOT of Cookie Butter. 

I gained, 14 lbs.

And well that is just not OK. I told Betty. I told my husband. I told my BLR friend Heather. I had to start telling on myself. So I thought what better than to tell the world, and our readers here on Phat Chances. This is not easy, we have said it a million times. As we get closer and closer to the two-year mark (November 27) we are looking at how far we have to go. And that is not the smartest thing to do. My last pounds feel like they will NEVER........EVER come off. And I get at least one message from Betty a week about how there seems to be no light at the end of this tunnel.  

And then, we have those moments when we look at what life is like and realize that it is COMPLETELY different. We work our asses off (Betty usually 2x a day). We eat and drink right 90% of the time. We are wearing pants that have been in the drawer for 5 years. 

We run 10ks. 

 LIFE IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. We might have work to do, but we also have to trust that we are doing OK. We are headed in the right direction and although slow going we are moving. Sorry it has been a while, we are refocusing. This two year mark came up fast. Can't wait to share our Phat Chances future with all of you in 2014! 

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

TRUST THE PROCESS

CHANGE FOREVER.

Media Mom

by Cara

As a mom, or as Betty calls me "Media Mom" I am linked to so many people through Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram (#PhatChances), oh and don't forget My Fitness Pal and logging my workouts on Beachbody and Map My Run. Holy smokes, that is a lot of connection. It is a lot of logging in and checking in and pinning and posting and you name it. I sometimes feel overwhelmed by it, and sometimes I think about the few people I do know that are not connected or are only connected in one or two ways. I am jealous.

But just like this blog, logging in, checking in and posting and pinning is my ACCOUNTABILITY. It is my chance to stay connected to my journey, that I will be on forever. Will I post about it forever, maybe. I can never go back, and being visible and vulnerable is what makes this journey FOR REAL. 

What I do know is I need to be more purposeful in when and how I am using it. If I am with the fam or doing something meaningful, I need to put it away and live in the moment. I need to make sure my memories are in my head just as much as they are posted or checked in on my social media outlets. I need to be a successful mom just as much as I need the success of my healthy lifestyle.

I find pinned photos or instagrammed photos that I share all of the time. A lot of the photos I share have been shared by thousands of people before me, but it has meaning to my journey and so I share it too. This week there was one that just hit home for me, because it is not just about working out or meal prepping, it is about sharing life with the people you love and being fully present. When I say I just didn't have time, what was I actually doing with my time. Time is all we really have. Spend it wisely.

END THE TREND

by Cara

Team Beachbody. Shakeology. Chalene Johnson. FOCUS T25. TurboFire. Coaching.

What is this and why is Phat Chances supporting it?! We have said before that we INSPIRE to be INSPIRED by you, by friends and family and complete strangers. For the last 20 months as we have traveled this journey the number of people that have joined us is in itself AMAZING. We field questions, we listen to challenges and share in hope and dreams of fitness and living healthy lifestyles.

Our fantastic trainer/friend and whom we now would consider part of our family, John Hebison, introduced us to Shakeology. I think we posted about Shakeology and our experience with it a few (maybe more) months ago.  Team Beachbody is an avenue to share our journey with even more people, but more importantly it gives us the resources and tools to support and encourage in even more ways than we already are.

P90X and INSANITY have become household names, or at least you have passed Tony Horton or Shaun T on a late night informercial. They are becoming house hold names because people are understanding the importance of health and wellness. I love Beachbody's tag line, END THE TREND (of obesity). Team Beachbody is not just about sweating in your living room or drinking a shake a day, it is about giving yourself the power to make life changes, for health of course but also for overall wellness. I am excited to be a part of this and I want to share it with anyone else who is interested.

Please remember, Phat Chances is proof that there is no magic pill (or shake), there is only hard work, dedication and a few tears. Even with Beachbody and with Shakeology there MUST be hard work, commitment and sweat! Watch the video below. See if this is something you WANT, something you NEED. And then take the steps to COMMIT and you will SUCCEED.

It is FREE to just sign-up and look around the Beachbody website. Maybe that is your first step.




Please visit me at

www.beachbodycoach.com/CaraGarcia 

or for more information on Shakeology

www.myshakeology.com/CaraGarcia

I will be starting a 10-Day Challenge group SOON! Ask me how you can join and try it for 10 days!

All Business (AB)

by Brianne

I have recently found myself juggling my time more than usual. I have missed some boot camps, some personal training appointments and finding myself extra busy with social functions and events. Relationships are what make my life rich and brilliant. I am so blessed and honored to have people in my life that actually want to spend time with me. Those relationships make me who I am and time invested in them is very important to me even if that time is short. I will never give up on the people that I can’t live without, but for so many years I found myself living everyone else’s life. Never my own. I would take on take on hardships, worries and time attempting to make things right or less difficult for other people. I need to be mindful of my balance. Time for my relationships and time for me. The people that remain are my power for the tasks ahead.

“The task ahead is never as great as the power behind you” – San Jose Earthquakes Fans

Cara and I frequently use the term “AB”. AB stands for “All Business” and is code for shut up and do work…no excuses. Sometimes in life you need to stop with all the bullshit, focus on the task ahead and move forward. Countless times we have repeat worries, conversations, fallbacks and mistakes. In a perfect world, there would be no repeats. We are far from perfect, but repetition…negative repetition, is frustrating and can actually work as a catalyst against you. Hence, AB.

Should I find myself worrying about how slow the scale is moving, or how tired I am after a long day, or how friggin hot it is outside, or how sore my legs are from the new stairmaster workout Johnny gave me, or how much I would rather go out for drinks than go to boot camp, or the guilt I feel when I choose a workout over someone I love…I remind myself this is a process.

And I trust the process.

However, the process won’t work if you don’t.

Stop with the bullshit.

The time is now.

All business.

AB.

Shout outs:

Johnny…difficult conversations aren’t easy to have especially when I know they are true, but because of them, you are helping me save my life and there are no words to truly express my profound appreciation for the investment you have made in my journey. Real talk.

Through friends of friends of friends, a special friend came into my life through Instagram a few months ago. Cynthia (@dink_donk) and I have never met face to face. She lives down the street from me in Emeryville and is someone I can unconditionally relate to. Our struggles are similar and worries are consistent. She is a lovely soul who has inspired me many times. Today, she said I inspired her. Life is good.

Kelly Potate McCain…You are stunning inside and out. My sister and I are so lucky to have you in our lives. I have faith that our distance will shorten soon and all will be as it should be.

Went to my first professional soccer game. It was friggin awesome. The crowd chants and there is thick layer of pride in the air that inspired me from start to finish. Happy Birthday Nan! Best day ever. Go Earthquakes!

We are also really excited to announce that Cara has become a Beachbody Coach. Joining Johnny and hundreds of thousands of other motivating and inspiring people to help others along their journey to health and wellness. Beachbody is not just about P90X and Shakeology (although those come highly recommended) it is about having the tools and access to changing your life. 

If you are interested in learning more please email Cara at caramgarcia@gmail.com or check out Beachbody here and look for her Coach page: CaraGarcia.

Stronger Everyday: An Update

by Brianne

It is safe to say if we lacked on our weight loss the way we have on our blog, we would not be doing so well. We are 18 months in and going strong. Though recently, we have both been dealing with some unfortunate, but realistic struggles. If all weight loss consisted of was clean eating and fitness, there wouldn’t be an obesity epidemic. The game is all mental. Get your mind right, and you will find success. But to get your mind right, it takes abso-fucking-lutely everything you’ve got and we are not there, just yet. Together my sister and I have spent the last 18 months relearning how to live and think healthfully. We have down the processes of  “park your car farther away, take the stairs, salad dressing on the side, wear our (new) Polar watch, drink a shit-ton of water” lifestyle. We get it. We know it. We live it. What we struggle with, what most people struggle with, is the daily motivation to keep a positive attitude when we feel exhausted and overwhelmed, get our asses to the gym/trainer when our bodies are screaming at us, choose chicken and spinach over crap food or no food when we are starving and/or rushed, and dealing with the reasons we found ourselves overweight in the first place, without using food to cope. Though we have many sustainable routines in place, it takes every ounce of mental strength we have and to find long-term success, we must be even stronger.

If we know how to eat right and sweat right, then how do we get our minds right?

It takes time. A tenacious diligence of positive mindful thought that becomes greater and stronger each day. However, inspiration, grand, amazing, prideful INSPIRATION becomes the catalyst to keeping momentum during this mental game. We may never have our minds perfectly right where everything just becomes easy shmeezy, but inspiration sure does make you think you might.

Cara and I have found inspiration from some amazing people we have met along the way. It keeps us going. Friends we met at the Biggest Loser Resort, the Biggest Loser winners and contestants we have the honor of knowing, our Boot Camp beasts, close friends and family, all our social media friends that we may have or may not have officially met and so so many more. It reminds us that people just like us can change completely. To choose change in the face of adversity is brilliance. We are so honored to be a part of your lives (even if only on Instagram straight flexin).

No matter what your goals are (100 pounds, 10 pounds, maintenance), you must find strength within yourself to wake up everyday and continue. This is the mental game where your want for change must be greater than anything else. Inspiration. That is how.

Update:

I am eating approximately 1400 calories a day. Working out 5-6 days a week for 1-2 hours. I drink 100 ounces of water a day and I use Shakeology as a meal replacement.

I have lost 128 pounds, 8 dress sizes, down 22 inches around my abdomen and have gained much better outlook on the life I want for myself, which I believe to be the true measure of success. I have more to lose and lots more work to do, but it's happening. It will happen.

Cara eats between 1200-1400 calories a day, works out 4-5 times per week, has been tracking her food for over 100 days on My Fitness Pal (that1momma) and has lost 87 lbs.

 Shout outs:

To the cousins: Kasey, Kelly and Meghan…our daily conference texts light up our lives. The humor and honesty found in our group texts is seriously fucking super amazing. You are right beside us and we are right beside you to the moon and back. “Even though I am twitching and want to knaw my arm off, I feel great”.

Kian! If there is one person who should win an award for achieving success while the world has gone dark, it’s you. Amidst all that you have been put through, with all of the obstacles placed in your path, YOU ARE GRADUATING FROM NURSING SCHOOL. I feel proud. Like ‘yell at the top of my lungs and cry and laugh and jump up and down and roll around on some grassy field wearing a cap and gown singing to Michael Jackson’ proud. Though I never once doubted your ability, I am so inspired. Congrats Ma. My rib.

Johnny…You have not given up on me even when I have wanted to give up on myself. Your positive attitude has kept me aligned with the goals we have set. You are so much more than my trainer. Thanks BFF. Means the world to me. Ride or die. Check out his website… www.bodybyjheb.com

Tips:

Social media: stalk the people who inspire you to live the best life you can possibly live. Stalk-inspiration. Or just follow them, thats ok too!

To inspire ourselves and anyone who reads this blog, we will be starting a series called “Phat Chances' Skinny Summer” where inspirational people will be highlighted as guest Phat Chances bloggers.  Throughout this summer, we will be reaching out to some of the people that inspire us most. If you have a story to tell, tell us about it! We would love to feature you or if you want us to highlight someone that inspires you, please email us at caramgarcia@gmail.com or bcanepa@comcast.net.

This is NOT a Race

We are 18 months into our weight loss journey. 

It seems to be getting harder. Although we know EVERYTHING....what works and what doesn't, what we need to eat and what we shouldn't, life keeps moving on. We are finding more and more things to inspire us. We Instagram it (#PhatChanes), we Facebook it....heck we talk about this journey to anyone who wants to listen, the jeweler that is sizing a wedding ring we haven't worn since Christmas, the nice lady at the soup counter asking if we know about nutrition ...OH I KNOW ABOUT NUTRITION.

And yet the fire is smoldering. Day after day looking to reach a goal and day after day sometimes it is the same and sometimes it is creeping in the wrong direction. But everyday looking in the mirror and being reminded just how far we have come, because truth is we will NEVER go back. There are HUGE non-scale victories that we do celebrate, a new clothing size, weights and squats we couldn't do before, a calorie burn that makes us feel accomplished. These are all good things. 

Today is a fun run in San Francisco, the 102nd Annual Bay to Breakers about 9 miles straight across this amazing city. We have never actually run in B2B, although today would have been one heck of a run, the weather is PERFECT. Bay to Breakers is not a race, people dress in costumes or in nothing, build teams and there is a lot of drinking along the way. Marathons are not races either, you just want to finish. 

So today we are encouraging anyone who is on this journey to remind yourself, THIS (weight loss journey, fit LIFE) IS NOT A RACE. 

THIS IS NOT A RACE.

*We would like to apologize for the lack of Blog Posts. More updates to come, like the 18 month stats and photos.*

{It's Now or Never}

by Brianne

One month ago, Cara and I stood in front of a group of amazing women led by the one and only, Menne Hall to commit to goals for 2013. We have joined a group called She’s Now or Never and it could not have come at a better time. The purpose of the group is to find support in reaching goals you set for yourself, but many goals are not reached because of a true lack in living the fit life. Health can limit you or thrust you forward. For me and many of the women in She’s Now or Never, our health has held us back, stopped us from moving forward and accomplishing goals we set for ourselves. This has left us with a sense of fear and failure that is hard to overcome. Joining this group allows me and my fellow SNN sisters to come together and find that balance in living a healthy lifestyle. We bravely stood before each other and read our commitment letters aloud confirming our vulnerability and most importantly the accountability that goes into such tasks. However, since the commitment ceremony, I have found myself struggling.

Many overweight people say they look forward to fitting on roller coasters once they reach their goal weight or at least find themselves small enough to wait in line and make an attempt, however who knew starting a weight loss journey would mean every day is a roller coaster ride? After all this, I have had enough of the twists and turns and jolts and my arms are sore from holding them in the air. There are days I find myself ready to be done with the ride. I want to wave the roller coaster operator down to stop the ride, raise the safety bars and let me get the f*&k off.

I hit a wall around Christmas and though, I am still on this damn roller coaster of a weight loss journey, there were a couple attempts made at waving down the operator. I find myself waiting for something to click. I envision this light switch that exists within the minds and bodies of healthy fit people that flips on at some point to illuminate their path to this fit life I so desperately want to live in, but nonetheless, I am not sure I even have this switch in me, let alone a light to find my way. This may sound depressing and distant, but this shit isn’t easy. I am still pushing, still fighting, but I am struggling. I still deal with residual food addiction issues and find myself eating for wrong reasons. It may be carrots, but my relationship with food is still a part of my journey that has not flipped that switch.

What I know is that I feel better than I did over 100 pounds ago and I don’t want to lose that. I can clearly remember the first day I started my journey at the Biggest Loser Resort and it was a feeling….a nightmare that I can still taste. I felt like I was going to die and though my trainer may push me that hard now, I know it’s not as hard as it was at 361 pounds.

What I know is that I have met more people that understand and support me in the last year than I have in the last 10 years and that is simply amazing. Instead of hiding behind a disease, I am standing in front of my past and will never look back.

What I know is that this damn roller coaster is all part of the journey. I must feel all the ups and downs and twists and turns in order to exit the ride with a true sense of what it means to be a healthy person in control.

What I know is that I used to not be able to touch my elbow to my knee during bicycle crunches and now I can. Every time.

What I know is that I can see and feel a change in my body that makes me proud.

What I know is that change equals a chance to get it right. A phat chance.

Shout outs:

Menne…thank you for your selfless service. I admire you and the work you do for others. SNN exists because you followed your vision and persisted until you accomplished your goal. That’s what this is all about. Reaching my goals seems so much more attainable when I have a strong woman showing me it can be done.

Cara…we recommitted on January 26, 2013 to what we know and trust. Look at how far we have come and how much we have done. I am so proud of you and your skinny body. Trust the process.

To me: I know the conversations you have inside that head of yours and some days they are sad. You are just a girl that wants to be happy. You mean no harm and want to do well for yourself and the people in your life. Sometimes you make it harder than it needs to be. Sometimes you forget that a positive mental attitude can change everything. Don’t forget how you started, why you started and what you have done to get here now. Recognize you can’t make everyone happy. Just focus on you and your goals and life will fall into place. It’s a damn roller coaster so raise your arms up, open your eyes and go with it. There will be shit days, but you would rather have shit days than no days. It’s now or never.

Finding Inspiration Online

by Cara

"Fast. Easy. Convenient" I was driving to work and there was a commercial on the radio for some special diet drops or pills or something. And "Fast. Easy. Convenient" were the words used to describe this diet. I have also heard people talking about how they have already stopped their "New Year's Resolutions" and are already looking for that quick diet fix to lose the pounds they committed to lose in 2013. Let's set one thing straight....there is NOTHING easy, fast, or convenient about dieting. And thats the other thing we have to change this terminology, it is no longer a diet, it is a lifestyle.

Choosing to be healthy, rather than not even noticing what you are eating or that you haven't walked farther than from your car (in the closest parking spot possible) into the store or your house or the restaurant, this is a lifestyle that requiers mindfulness on every front. This lifestyle requiers commitment, dedication, goal setting, preping and most of all TIME. There will be situations that are not convenient, there will be days and most of all workouts that will not be easy. And this is not going to happen fast. 

Here's the exciting thing. This weight loss and LIFESTYLE community is amazing. There are people out there that are all doing this. There are people that want so badly to make a change in their life, who are inspired each day by someone else. Brianne and I have been so motivated and inspired by the kindness and the inspiration that we have found in others. The messages, texts, comments, Facebook LIKES, are all noticed. We feel the love. We are truly humbled and thankful that our story might just touch the life of someone else. But here's the thing, we are not doing this to get attention we are sharing our story because we were looking for stories ourselves. By sharing our story we hope that we can motivate even just one person to be mindful. That really is all it is. Be mindful of what and how much you are eating and of how often you move your body. Start slow if you have to, but then take the time to write down what you hope to accomplish. Maybe its a number, but maybe it is trying new veggies or walking or hiking.

We want to encourage everyone reading to really seek out online groups that are there to support each other. And if you are involved in groups now we want to encourage you to be positive toward the group and in how you share your stories and your struggles. If you only share the negatives or the hard parts you lose sight of the good things and the successes as they come. CELEBRATE. There are so many good things to come...it might be SLOW. HARD. and COMPLICATED, but it sure is worth it.

We would like to share with you some of our favorites. Check out these motivational people and places that inspire Phat Chances everyday:

Mom Strength

By Cara

This post has been in the makings for a while. I recently was laid off from a part time job, I have another job, but I had a lot of work to complete before I turned in my keys. I have been wanting to share my experience on this journey and being a mom at the same time. I know that there are plenty of moms out there that need some perspective from a "loser" mom. "Loser" as in losing weight and being a mom at the same time. I like to think I am a good mom, there are times maybe even I think I could do a better job, but as long as they are warm, fed and have happy faces, I am doing OK. 

A little over one year ago

I looked like this. I weighed 308 lbs after having Sylas 

(son #2 in the right picture).

I wore a size 22 and was happy. I honestly thought that I was doing all I could, by walking to the playground and taking the boys out. But I was also eating enough for 4 people at EVERY meal. 

Just one week after this birthday party photo with Syals was taken, my sister Brianne and I began our journey with our 2 week stay at the Biggest Loser Resort in Malibu. At the start of this journey in November 2011, at 280 lbs I accepted the fact that deep down I was not happy. I wanted to be the track athlete that I was in high school  I wanted to have something in my life that I could turn to when I needed to de-stress. Working out is a natural anti-depressant. As a mom I have happily accepted that there are 2 lives that must be placed before my own. Having children means that you are bathing, feeding and teaching (among a MILLION other things) little lives that need to be shaped into positive and happy grown men (or women). There are times that this is the most stressful job ever, just thinking about the fact that 2 people will walk this Earth based on what I teach them.......STRESSSS.

In the last 4 years that I have been teaching my babies to now be children I had enormous amounts of guilt. Guilt to leave them even with family members to get "ME" time. I had guilt about leaving them in the gym day care because they are my responsibility and I shouldn't pawn them off to some stranger while I am just in the other room sweating. EXCUSES. I have spent the last 15 months teaching myself that it is ok, that they are ok. Whether they are home with a family member or in the gym day care they are having fun, everyone is happy and I am happy too. This guilt still gets to me, but I realize that if I am going to be a better mom we have to have this time. 

I have also found some great opportunities to sneak workouts in. While they eat breakfast I do a 20-25 minute cardio video or I get them set with a few activities or ipad games and I sneak downstairs for a 20 minute spin on my stationary bike. I also do get one training session in per week with a trainer and a spin class. They are either with me at the gym in daycare or if my younger sister is off she comes by and I take off. Sometimes with all that a day entails with kids I find that I am getting a workout in at 9:00pm. They are in bed and I am infront of the TV with Turbo Fire for 40-50 minutes, or on the bike. There are days when I reach the end of the day and am too exhausted to workout, as long as I get 4 workouts in per week I reach my goal. My husband Ryan has lost 60 lbs and we get at least one "date" a week at BOOT CAMP. In the end it also comes down to food. I need to make sure that my food is just right. Since starting this journey we finally have our oldest son eating spinach (hidden in whole wheat grilled cheese or in homemade pizza).  We ahve made significant changes in food and I am only eating single portions, measured out and weighed.

This is a lifestyle change that I will hold onto for life. And because I am teaching my sons to be healthy young men, they are following my example and we get outside biking or playing for at least one hour each day. I am happy to say that most days work, but I will be honest its not everyday. Growing kids is hard work, but it is amazing and fun. There is a balance and although flexibility is key to making this work, it can be done. 

If you are looking for more about what life looks like on a daily basis you can find Phat Chances on Facebook, you can become a reader here on our blog and you can always message us or leave comments in either forum. 

{My Hall of Fame}

by Brianne

Just a reminder the Biggest Loser season 14 starts this Sunday!!! As frequently mentioned in other posts, the Biggest Loser TV show has always served as a gleam of hope for me. Regular people just like me trying to make a change when they feel like they have nothing left. Struggle is struggle. It’s transparent. For those that watch the show, may you find inspiration and peace in knowing you are not alone. For those of you who don’t watch it, start. Support it.

My trainer, John ‘Body By J-Heb’ Hebison plays a song repeatedly (unfortunately for some) during group workouts that has really got me thinking. I ended 2012 excited and hopeful for 2013, but just 3 days into it, I was struck with my usual lava flow of doubt. It creeps up all slow and thick and takes over. I know what I have accomplished. I know what I am capable of. I know how to get to where I want to be, but there is a current that runs through me causing me to wonder if life is just meant to push you whether you make it or not. The last thing I want to hear during a sweaty exhausting workout or resisting cake and soda would be “Good work, keep going, but you will never get there”. Shoot me. Sometimes it feels that way. I am surrounded by people who hustle. They work their asses off to build businesses, lose weight, raise amazing kids, lead teams, create, improve and persist to reach their goals. I am constantly in awe and always inspired. I would never think they were working this hard and won’t ever reach/sustain their goals, so why do I doubt myself?

Cara and I recently met with this awesome TV producer named Drew. We were being interviewed about the Biggest Loser Resort (details to follow) and during the interview he asked some really tough questions. Questions about where I am now, where I used to be and what got me to that and this place. Reflection like that always returns me to a confident state internally, which allows me to see my work is, at the very least, notable. Though, I still have a ways to go on my weight loss journey, a talented TV producer would not be setting up lights and cameras in my house if I had not done something worth a bit of his time. (Although, I do believe my family could be on a seriously successful, but horrible-train-wreck-addicting style reality TV show….mess). Drew returned back to LA to begin editing and I returned to a reset, reminded that I am proud of what I have done, insanely lucky and grateful to have my sisters, Cara and Nicole beside me and an ever-constant intensity to never allow myself to return to the person I used to be.

How-the-fuck-ever, as 2012 rung out, 2013 rang in with a completely different bang.

I missed a couple workouts, ate some pie, had a meal or 2 over 500 calories and replaced some of my water intake with champagne, Jack, Jameson and Ciroc during this past holiday season. Though, I did not gain one pound, I didn’t lose one either. Some would say maintaining is a success, but for me, right now on my journey, I must maintain momentum. I am not being too hard on myself and believe me I enjoyed my treatssss, but I had a workout the other night, my first 1:1 session of 2013 and a therapy session with JHeb that allowed my slight fall back to surface. It’s not even a fall back. It’s the thought of a fall back that turned my excitement from 2012 into daunting doubt for 2013. I cried. I got angry. I wanted to give up.

How-thankfully-ever, I managed to get myself out of the rut I ever-so-easily succumb to with the help of some of my Hall of Famers. They are my family, the people I spent the holidays with my fellow BLR alum, my boot campers, my dearest friends, some brand new friends, my mentors, fellow hustlers, fans and Phat Chance blog readers. I am humbled and inspired and committed to the process…the journey…my life.

An entire year could have gone by…12 months, 365 days…entire year…A WHOLE YEAR….2012-2013, like so many other damn years….an entire year could have gone by without a change. Or the exact friggin opposite could happen. For me, with all the ruts and doubts, the exact opposite happened. 2012 was one of the hardest, but most rewarding years of my entire life. In honor of JHeb and his amazing, but occasionally overplayed song, I go into 2013 knowing I could be the greatest, I could be the best, I could go the distance, I could run the mile, I could be a hero and I am doing it for my pride.

Shout outs:

To the people in my Hall of Fame: I dedicate the song “Hall of Fame” by The Script to you.  You are students, teachers, believers, leaders, champions, true seekers and I am changed for the better…for the best, because of you.

Johnny…Get it right. Get it tight. Thank you for believing in me, dealing with me, and pushing me every damn day. This the year.

To the Biggest Loser Resort: Cara and I hope we did you proud in the video and we hope we continue to inspire people to go to where it all started for us.

Mike Messina!!! Our dearest friend and at-home winner of Biggest Loser 13, has ventured out to pay it forward. He has joined up with Dr. Huizenga of the Biggest Loser at a wellness retreat called The Clinic (you can check it out here). Mike is on staff as the Trainer and Motivator. These places exist to help you change your life. We wish Mike and The Clinic much success and thank you for inspiring us every day.

To me: Make 2013 be even better than 2012. It’s goal weight year baby. Stop doubting it, jerk. Here we go…